New at this so I take any kind of critic

[Puynsi]

http://postimg.org/image/tozlrmtch/
(Since the image isnt working for some reason I will leave the URL)

Name: Yaggdrasil (or Yagdra for shorts)
Age: 18
Race: Yet Unknown (probably earth pony)
Likes: peace, sleeping, have control over his actions.
Dislikes: chaos, meaningless destruction, being taken over HIM

Bio (as far as I can think of maybe I will update later):

Intro and Origins:
As Everypony knows, the Everfree forest is home of many dark and obscure things, sometimes they are real and some times they are not, or at least thats what we think
Hes a failed magical experiment made by a cult who worshipped evil spirits and demons, his father, the priest of such cult and his mother, the "Empress" decided that for gaining more power they would need... an Alicorn, by evil schemes and use of forbbiden magic they were pretty close of achieving that, but as in every rushed experiment something goes off, wich caused to leave things... "unfinished", althought he gained the magical powers of an Alicorn, it was unstable, due to this his wings were left almost useless and his body in a really bad state.

What happened after such thing? BAD things, the magic overload inside of Yagdras body made him a mana bomb... The ruins wich the sage found Yagdra within were probably made by... a "fugue" of this magic energy, the sage full of remorse decided to shatter the unholy horn wich glowed with an evil aura.
After this the sage took the decision of taking care of this poor foal.

Foalhood:
To prevent that such evil energy ended up destroying Yagdra completly, the sage created stones capable of storing gigantics amounts of energy and placed them on shackles wich Yagdra would need to use from now on.
For Yagdra Life was good until he discovered that those peacefull nights that he enjoyed so much, his old pony went out to fight creatures knowns as Changelings, "Shapeshifters" as the sage called them. Knowing this he begged the sage to train him and be of some help and not a burden, this is were the sage explained everything about the changelings, what they are, how they feed and who gave him such task, Princess Celestia, he said, at this point Yagdra was tired of story lessons and where his training started.
With this, Yagdra ,under the tutelage of the sage, trained, trained and trained, not only physically, but psycologically (not giving the enought importance to the last one), but as the old pony said, "Strenght and Iron will isnt everything you need", Yagdra decided to read every single book that the house holded, allowing him to improve his knowledge as much as he could.

Colthood:
At the age of 15 he decided that he was ready to face a challenge and against the sage orders he attacked a Changeling hive, this was as you can imagine one of the most dumb ideas that anypony can come up with.
After reaching a close-by hive, Yagdra without even thinking about the consequences of this, when he started it was a piece of cake, but they kept coming and coming and coming, until Yagdra ended up badly injured, tired and desperate, as he just decided to give up and faint the sage breaked trought the hordes with his magic and dragged Yagdra, wich fainted, out of there.

As days passed Yagdra woked up on his bed, barely able to move and remember what happened, then, with haste, started looking around for His master, just to find him... on the floor of the main room and a unfinished applepie and cyder on the table. After this Yagdra started to slowly loose his mind, "will the changelings come back?", "Why he couldnt just stay down and follow orders?", "What had he done?", even in this poor state of mind he kept guarding the Everfree surroundings, and of course, wich each passing day he became more and more paranoical.

To top it off, his magical energy was becoming unstable again and made him feel all that pain that dogded all those years while training... when he was about to completly loose it, a spirit, wich looked like a good one, promised him to lay down the pain and gain more control, as he was now, Yagdra, the changelings his master passing out due to his fault, the paranoia, he accepted without hesitating, but as the old pony said once "The Everfree must not be trusted", and he was right... not even a second after an evil voice overcame his mind, saying that he was the Harbringer of Insanity, and that Yagdras mind was just perfect to take over, but what the demon wasnt expecting was the fact that Yagdra was not a mere pony, as the Dark energy fused with Yagdras ,own evil energy, the demon got caught by it wich ended up on a magical reaction that almost pushed Yagdra to the very end, and like... if She was seeing everything... there was... the Majestic Princess Celestia... holding down the pain with her magic.

As he could see it coming, she asked for the sage, after explaining what happened to him Celestia decided to avoid an unnecessary waste of life and asked Yagdra to leave the house, wich obviously he declined energycally, then the Princess said, "What just happened to you cant be undone right now... your mind is still weak... and you shall overcome this... to overcome whats into you...", with remorse Yagdra asked where he could become... "stronger" wich Celestia answered, "Friends Yaggdrasil... You need friends, go to Ponyville, live, enjoy, rest, grow" with no more words Celestia called off the spell and Teleported Yaggdrasil to the Ponyville entrance.

And so, the not-so-pretty story of Yaggdrasil begins....

[Tiger]

First off, if it's a guy, why does he have eyelashes? *shot*

Anyway, alicorn OCs are rather OP and highly discouraged/disliked by most. Just stating.

What's his personality?
How could he learn magic even though he had a broken horn?
What happened to his ear?
Why can't this *cough* "god" need to inhabit the body of a pony? Can't he just go along on his own? And why would he help Yagdra if he's evil? It doesn't make much sense to me. Why do I feel a striking resemblance of this guy and the Nine-tailed fox in Naruto?

We're not quite sure where the changelings live either. But if they had been living in Everfree Forest, why hadn't the ponies in the show ever seen them when in Everfree Forest prior to the Season 2 Finale? This just rules it out from the possibilities of the homes of the changelings.

OC stories need to be possible in the show to make them believable and likable... Like-able? Um. I don't know the proper word 

Anyway, try to make his story fit more into the pony universe as much as possible. If there really is that thing of destruction, why wouldn't Celestia and Luna speak of it?

...Of course, they didn't speak of the Crystal Empire until S3E1, but still 

[Puynsi]

First off, if it's a guy, why does he have eyelashes? *shot*

Anyway, alicorn OCs are rather OP and highly discouraged/disliked by most. Just stating.

What's his personality?
How could he learn magic even though he had a broken horn?
What happened to his ear?
Why can't this *cough* "god" need to inhabit the body of a pony? Can't he just go along on his own? And why would he help Yagdra if he's evil? It doesn't make much sense to me. Why do I feel a striking resemblance of this guy and the Nine-tailed fox in Naruto?

We're not quite sure where the changelings live either. But if they had been living in Everfree Forest, why hadn't the ponies in the show ever seen them when in Everfree Forest prior to the Season 2 Finale? This just rules it out from the possibilities of the homes of the changelings.

OC stories need to be possible in the show to make them believable and likable... Like-able? Um. I don't know the proper word 

Anyway, try to make his story fit more into the pony universe as much as possible. If there really is that thing of destruction, why wouldn't Celestia and Luna speak of it?

...Of course, they didn't speak of the Crystal Empire until S3E1, but still 

Ok 1º: Sorry if I didnt noticed the eyelashes, I will remove them later.

2º: Hes calm, even so, he can be at the same time very short-tempered, he says that doesnt care about others even if thats a lie since even he would help an unknown pony, not very perceptive when trying to catch up with somepony else moods, a little daydreamy to the point of not paying attention to nothing except his thoughts, not very social (since he lived his whole life only with a Old sage who breed him as a baby), a little unsure of giving somepony else trust since he could come out hurt.

3º: Being born and raised at the Everfree forest expose you to many kinds of energies, you know, since in there exist many strange creatures, plus, he is a flaw, since even if he born with the horn and the wings that was because of his fathers, he was fashioned, not created, plus I havent gave him any OP yet.

4º: Those were seriously injured during the last battle, the one that the princesses saved him.

5º: The god cant exist by himself why you think they took the sage? STILL, he helps Yagdra only because he needs more time to gather more power and break free, if Yagdra gets killed before that he would just dissapear like a dark mist.               (personally I dont like Naruto, thats why I tryed to explain this with detail since you told me the Fox spirit stuff wich kinda http://forum.legendsofequestria.com/index.php?topic=2470.0">Read the forum rules.ed me off).

6º: This is a plausible point, still at royal wedding its was most than obvious that Changelings came from The Everfree Forest, Plus if Yagdra was raised by just an Old Lonely Unicorn then he should have lived very deep in the forest? (Sarcasm)
Plus It says he found a Lair and as far as I know the Changelings live spread (maybe not only the forest) around Equestria.

7º: Because I WANT TO DEVELOP HIS STORY ON THE BLOG!  And maybe because the god isnt strong as HE claims to be? (PLOT SPOILERS THANK YOU!  )

And what the matter with the seasons? If its mentioned then its Canon     AND! yeah he might looks like an Alicorn but I already saw ponies that even if they arent alicorn they are pretty OP (like those that are like Yagdra with something living inside of them OR being reincarnation of a lost forgotten creature OR many other examples that I dont recall right now)

[Gracie Sky]

#1: You'll need to spell check it.

The plot is a bit amateurish, but this is your first OC, so I'll help explain a few things.

The character is overpowered. He was created by magic by his father and suddenly and inexplicably orphaned at birth... in the Everfree Forest; that forest that ponies avoid due to the large number of dangerous animals and flora that inhabit it. But, he manages because he was adopted by a Sage pony who happens to live in the forest. For some reason, the Sage gets ponynapped by Changlings. It seems the Changlings needed the Sage to offer to their "Demonic God" to possess. To clarify, I've never seen demons, gods, or possession in Equestria, nor do I have evidence to believe such things to could exist in Equestria. Maybe possession... maybe.

Anyways, Yagdra decided the God should take him over instead... I hope I read that right. Yagdra was the one who made the decision to get possessed and not the God deciding to possess him instead of the Sage. It sounds very awkward. Now Yagdra has to deal with and fight the Demon God's personality inside of him. He spends his days fighting Changlings, including the Queen, Chrysalis.

Now... uh... that final battle didn't make much sense. You said Celestia (who is not a queen) and Luna appeared and Yagdra begged them for forgiveness of his incompetence. What incompetence are we talking about? He was fighting the Changlings, which is most definitely a villainous force which needs to be kept in check. Why is he apologizing to the Princesses, which I might add so conveniently appeared at the absolute last minute for no apparent reason to do whatever they did?

Lastly, he's suddenly dropped off in Ponyville of all places without a word or explanation.

To improve this, a lot of explanations and attention to details are required so the events that happen are more believable. So far, the whole demon god things just seems to be a plot devise to make the character more powerful than other ponies, since we don't know anything about this god or why the Changlings are offering sacrifices to it or why they would kidnap a Sage who lived in a maze of a forest.

[Puynsi]

The part of the possesion was kinda missunderstood, he offered instead of the sage, the reasons where mostly because he was a Giant walking magical ward (and they needed a very large amount of magic power to bring HIM, as said before he was fashioned not born like that, but that would include spoilers) and a more easy-to-take-over-target due of his magical inestability, I will say it again, why the hay is he overpowered if I merely gave him powers? furthermore, hes not showing off his skills like if he was almighty.

Cant a lonely sage live away from Pony society? Like Zecora? (even if she makes contact, shes mostly alone at her cottage in the Everfree forest).

About the incompetence, he felt like that into that ocassion, since he was fighting a lost battle, about Celestia and Luna appearing just in the right second, Chrysalis did the same, why that its so hard to understand? About Ponyville, its a nice place to start and get to know the exterior world wich he was never been able to see, perhaps if I can even make it to the point of plot development I could make him travel trought other cities and places, plus even if Manehattan is cannon, not much its known about the city (except for the Applejacks memories and the Bad apple chap.)

About the possesion stuff again, I said that he was possesed but he cant control the powers to his bid, yeah maybe he has some burst of dark energy but nothing like "Evil Total Destructor of Equestria mode", hes just a prison.

Abou details, yeah I will be more than happy to explain them if they are asked once at the time.
Plus I knew that All that looks like an Alicorn isnt very like-able for most users, I was prepared for that.

[Puynsi]

Ok here again to make a deeper story development on this OC:

For starters I knew that most people will ask about the horns and the Wings, so here are two Tales to make up for that! 
(Criticize all you want)

The "Horn" Storyline: (since I knew that most of you wont be perceptive enought to see that Yagdra didnt used any kind of magic since the "Possesion" chapter, wich would lead to the OC OP as you say)

Even if during his foalhood he managed to learn magic, it was only because of the magic stability wich was, with time, becoming more and more unstable, to the point that even a simple levitation spell could cause a very harmfull feedback, when he got possesed a really big effort and focus was needed to maintain (relative) control, when the sage gave up his life inheriting all of his magical abilitys, it wasnt MORE magic power what Yagdra obtained, but a really big control of the not only unstable but now (thanks to HIM) turbulent energy residing into him. Even so, HIM found that the horn could be a reliable escape route wich almost lead Yagdra to fully lose control, in a last resort decision, he crafted a hammer loaded with energy from the natural minerals that can be found within the forest, and destroyed his own horn (as painfull as it sounds), leaving only a shattered one in it place. Knowing that magic energy MUST flow or be released, with help of his Teacher old books he managed to upgrade the device that was designed by him and his Teacher, wich he called "The Entrophy Stone", wich its basically a magic energy drainer, putting him away from the danger of suffering an horrible death, at least for a time.
But even so, he needed to strenghten his body and mind to compensate the yet rising and even more turbulent energy inside of his body. After all of this he isnt able to cast spells, still he can use the overflowing energy to make big, yet harmless, energy waves.

From this really harsh experience he learned that all of his decisions, good or wrong, will lead to a consequence(s).

((So for shorts hes a magic time bomb, I hope that this helps to make it clear since I was hoping to develop this on the RP blogs but for now I`ll be happy of making him a recognised OC, plus if you give me time I will writte down the Wings auguments storyline))