ArtVeigar's OCs

Started by ArtVeigar, 2012 Dec 31, 08:50:05

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2012 Dec 31, 08:50:05 Last Edit: 2013 Sep 18, 20:40:43 by ArtVeigar
This is my OC list, hope you like it! Any criticism is accepted! :D

Spoiler: Arty Brightshadow • show
Name: Arty Brightshadow

Gender: Stallion

Race: Unicorn

Age: 17

Spoiler: show

His coat changes it's color depending on his state (further explanation ahead), changing from a bright white to a really dark black. the white spots in his mane and tails aways change places, working as a display that his body is processing the magic inside him.

Special Talent: Apparently, light (illumination and illusions (control of the visible light)) and dark spells (blinding ponies and shading specific areas and objects), depending on his state (light spells get better the better his personality is, and dark spells get better the worst his personality is), but his real special talent is gather the magical powers that comes from the feelings of ponies, animals and even from the nature that surrounds him. He can't control that yet, as even he doesn't understand how his body works, and because of this he is aways gathering the energy from the environment, making his abilities, personality and appearane unstable.

Personality: Usually, when he can use his magic, his personality is unstable and changes with the environment; when the environment is good, and ponies around him have good feelings, he has a good personality, being kind, generous, happy, loyal and honest. But when the environment is bad, and ponies around him have bad feelings, he has a bad personality, being mean, rude, selfish, violent, mad and crazy.
Normaly, the environment isn't completely bad nor completely good, so his personality becomes a mix of the environment's feelings, having traces of good and evil.
When the bad and good feelings in the environment are really strong (something really rare, what would happen only in a war between good and evil), his body can't process the mix, and he loses all his feelings, becoming a neutral and logical being.

Biography: Besides his unique colorshift mane and coat, there was another unique thing about him that draw the looks of everypony: he was born with his ying yang cutemark, due to him using his natural ability since his first breath, but it was something that nopony ever understood.
He was raised by a good and happy family in Canterlot, so he was almost aways in a brighter state. His magical talents began to show up at early age, and he easily entered the Canterlot School for Gifted Unicorns.
But with his shifting personality, things could get bad. And it got. The tragedy happened whe he was 12. It was a really stormy night. It was a family reunion, and things weren't very good. A very terrible family discussion was happening when the clock reached midnight. From the feelings of angry coming from his family, Arty's coat got black, and in a wave of madness, he blinded and tryed to attack everypony that was there, but stoped. When the feelings from his family and relatives changed from angry to worry and fear, Arty became afraid too. Afraid of himself. After seeing what he was about to do, he started crying. He dismissed the blinding magic and then ran away.
He ran away without a destination for hours, without stopping crying. He ran until he couldn't anymore and then isolated himsel in a cave somewhere near the road between Canterlot and Ponyville.
He, then, started to live on his own, trying to understand his mind, his body and his magic, but without much success. But even without understanding everything, after 5 years, he think it's already time to try to get back to society and finally end his feelings of lonelyness.

Spoiler: Tian Long • show
Name: Tian Long

Name meaning: Sweet dragon in chinese (at least it is what google says. If there is somepony there who knows if this is right, I'd love if you correct me)

Age: 18

Race: Earth Pony

Gender: Mare

Spoiler: show

Cutie Mark: A dragon

Special talent: Eastern martial arts

Origins: Monk monastery in the Foal Mountain

Personality: Peaceful, quiet, friendly and kind. Trained by the monks, she learned to respect and love all living beings and all the world itself, but she will aways fight for the sake of the innocents and weaks, because the same way you can show love by protecting, you can show love by teaching a bad pony how to be nice.

Biography: Tian doesn't know her family. She was found abandoned in front of the Monastery of Harmony inside a basket and with her name writen in a piece of paper, but to be abandoned in a place so hard to reach, but with the fame of being the most peaceful place in Equestria, besides having already a name, shows that her parents loved her, even if they couldn't be with her.
She was created among the monks, helping taking care of the temple with cleaning, gardening, making food and other type of house works.
Even if she lived in the Monastery, she wasn't forced to become a monk, as it is a path that must be chosen. But being raised by the masters, she always looked up to them, and when she turned 10, she decided to start her training. She learned to read and write the ancient languages that were still used in the temple, and studied the ancient culture and philosophy of Equestria, things long lost for anypony outside the Monastery. But what she liked the most was martial arts, what was confirmed by the fact she earned her cutie mark after training day and night to performe techniques considered of high level for someone as young as her.
She lived like that until she turned 18 and had her coming of age ceremony. In this ceremony, besides some traditional rituals, the wise grandmaster would tell a prophecy. When the great monk saw Tian, he spoke almost immediately: "You must find what always changes from white to gray and to black, and show it the color of your heart."
She couldn't think about anything else. She never understood the words of the great monk, but they say that few are the ones who understand the prophecy before it happens. But one thing was clear: she wouldn't find whatever it was told her to find inside the monastery.
She packed her things, but it was too hard to leave the place she loved so much. She still spent one week there doing what she usually did; enjoying her last usual days in the monastery, until she got the courage to leave.
After leaving she started traveling without a direction, helping anyone who seemed like needed a help and looking for any clue about what would be what aways change colors.

Monastery of Harmony and Temple of Harmony: It was raised in honor of the two princess, said to be founded after the royal sisters defeated Discord for the first time and freed Equestria. It is also a monastery for ponies who want to leave everything behind to know what truly is harmony, not only living it, but understanding all of it's basic elements and how to achieve the most harmonious state a pony can be, called the Neighvana. you see, after Discord was defeated, the ponies were still troubled after living so much time in disharmony and didn't understand really well the princesses' philosophy and they keep living their discordant lives. The Princesses, who were too busy with problems all over the country, having to fix all the mess Discord had done after so much time in power, chose some ponies as disciples and taught them all of the harmonic arts. Then, they spread all over Equestria, acting like the voice of royalty, teaching the ponies and truly freeing them from their discordant past.
But, after achieving their goal and making Equestria the harmonious place it is today, they noticed and accepted they weren't neede anymore. At least, not at that time. For that reason, they isolated themselfs at the Foal Mountain and dedicated themselfs to master the harmonious arts, as even if Celestia and Luna had taught them, they were simple mortal ponies who couldn't fully understand the knowledge of such gods. They started gathering ancient knowledge all around the world, and some times the princesses themselves went to explain things they would find that were too complex for them to figure out on their own. They also learned the harmonic martial arts, also taught by the princesses. They said it was the most effective art against anything that would stand in the way of harmony.

Note: The fact that her destiny is tied to Arty's doesn't mean he will, with sure, be her special somepony and vice versa. I still don't know what will happen, and it will be defined by how they will interact in the roleplays I do with both.

Spoiler: Tian Feng • show

Name: Tian Feng

Age: 21

Gender: Stallion

Race (only canon races, please): Unicorn

Appearance: Amber eyes, cream-colored coat and dark-gray mane and tail. His mane is straight and remarkable long, the end of it even reach the ground, while some locks of hair run over his face and covers part of it. His Tail is also long, almost half of it touches the ground. He wears a plain brown robe and a straw hat. His cutie mark is a detailed feather carved in wood.

Talent: His hands are light and precise and he is very creative, enabling him to easily master any form of handicraft that needs a delicate touch, like sculpting and pottery crafting. His magic is also very precise, and is a wonderful tool when crafting.

Personality and description: Very calm and always seems to look at the bright side of everything. He's wise and it's almost impossible to take him out of his mind. Tian Feng is always smiling in a calm way, making it really hard to read his feelings. He loves nature and all the living beings, and hates war and conflicts. He dreams about having his art scattered all around the world, filling it's owners with calm and peace of mind, hope and harmony by just looking at it.

Backstory: The Tian family was known as a family of artistis of every species. There were poets, painters, artisans, musicians. Feng wasn't different, and guided by his mother, Tian Shua, a painter, and his father, Tian Chumo, a scupltor, it was easy to discover his talent as a sculptor, just like his father. But even if sculpting was what he liked the most, he also showed an amazing talent at every other form of handicrafting. His family thought him everything he needed to know, like how he should respect nature and the other ponies around him, how to put every of his feelings into his art, and even how to take care of himself in the world. Even if his family was pacific, they needed to be able to protect their loved ones, their dreams and their ideals at any cost.
Feng wasn't the first Tian who wanted to travel around the world, and when he completed 21 years old, his family and himself agreed it was time for him to follow his dream.

Other information of importance: Carries with him what he needs: food, a small bag of bits and his cart with his crafting supplies. Has a good animal empathy. Can use the flow of his magical leylines to increase his senses inside a small area, what is the technic he uses to increase his precision while crafting. Ancestor of Tian Long.

Rad Thunder

Some of that backstory is a little too gruesome for my tastes, but at least you put out more detail then a simple sentence.


I just read the no violence rule of the forum, so I had to make some modifications to make it more family friendly. I'm a little used to create and roleplay characters in stories a little more violent than MLP.

Gracie Sky

What you have here is some sort of prodigy or oracle, right? He possesses this personality complex of unknown origin that are not typical of ponies that he does not understand, was born with a yin and yang cutie mark, and he changes color based on his surrounding. None of these phenomenon are explained nor are such explanations even attempted.

Talk about a pony that needs to be babysat or kept in a perpetually happy environment to keep both himself and the public safe.

Hopefully, you at least have the extent of his backstory and lineage in your head, when the time comes for you to explain why Arty is the way he is.
Character Critique Thread

Have your OC fairly and honestly evaluated!


2013 Jan 17, 20:24:06 #4 Last Edit: 2013 Jan 18, 14:30:46 by ArtVeigar
That's the idea. He's somepony who's born to keep the surrounding's state and feelings. The main problem in the situation he almost killed everyone is that he was sleeping when the bad feelings started. Otherwise, while his state was good, he would help maintain the peace there. But the world in general is an important part of his state, as he's affected by the world feelings too, and at midnight meanwhile a storm was occurring, the world's feelings were the worst possible. He'll aways try to maintain his actual state, and try to keep the place like it is before it changes, be it for good or bad.
This way, he is an important key to maintain the world peace, at the same time he may be used to change the world for bad, if he's raised in a bad environment.

This way, this OC can be used both as a good character or as a villain in a story. I'm someone who likes to play both sides.

EDIT: Added "scientifical" explanation for Arty's shifting personality, magic and color and added a new OC: Tian Long!

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