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121
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 18:08:34
Sveta simply sat outside on the beach shore, smiling at the sky.
The cold tells me I am alive. The snow tells me there is much more than what I can remember. The sky shows me how much there still is left to be seen, and done.
The cold tells me I am alive. The snow tells me there is much more than what I can remember. The sky shows me how much there still is left to be seen, and done.
122
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach RP OOC
2014 Jul 30, 18:01:13
I have RP time for the next tenish hours. Go right away! I work to make a believable character, and then kind of run them on auto pilot. I'm just here to see what would happen.
123
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach RP OOC
2014 Jul 30, 17:55:38
Depends Dawn, you want to see what would happen?
124
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 17:53:43
((Chose with Care Dawn))
As Sveta trundled along the way across the breadth of the beach, the tears on his coat felt cold, and his eyes stung from the cold air. With a squinting glance upward, the source of the unnatural coal became clear. The higher atmosphere winds designed to pull the humid air above the Everfree, managed to snag an unruly set of Everfree Weather. It looked as though it was a deep cloud layer, but with Everfree storms, you never know.
He sighed, Well, at least there is still beauty left for those who know it is here. A sad smile crept upon his expression, And even if I failed, and can't find the majesty in these works now, then I should enjoy this beauty for those who can no longer.
With that, he smiled up at the sky.
As Sveta trundled along the way across the breadth of the beach, the tears on his coat felt cold, and his eyes stung from the cold air. With a squinting glance upward, the source of the unnatural coal became clear. The higher atmosphere winds designed to pull the humid air above the Everfree, managed to snag an unruly set of Everfree Weather. It looked as though it was a deep cloud layer, but with Everfree storms, you never know.
He sighed, Well, at least there is still beauty left for those who know it is here. A sad smile crept upon his expression, And even if I failed, and can't find the majesty in these works now, then I should enjoy this beauty for those who can no longer.
With that, he smiled up at the sky.
125
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach RP OOC
2014 Jul 30, 17:42:51
A Very Merry Unbirthday Teal! Also, envy for the Hub... *grr*
126
Original Characters / Re: Jewel Vaunte
2014 Jul 30, 17:40:38
Oh no doubt, I believe that a pony like this could most defiantly exist! Don't get me wrong, the character is good. Matter of fact, it is an excellent character, for a purpose. While I did find many of the potential pitfalls, they would mainly only come into play if it was used repeatedly.
As you said, that she is more a medium than a character, it becomes apparent the reasons for the back story. If she remained afterward for larger parts of the time, her personality could become a bit wearing, but that wouldn't be the case. Since you clarified that she was to be utilized more than used, it makes much more sense why her personality is so two dimensional.
As for the explanation of the reactions, I did that as a knee-jerk reaction, and I apologize. Generally, if a character has a back story similar to this, it is used as a validation of the characters action, and not a plot device in and of itself. I am sorry about that, it was to cover potential problems. And, yes. I do not agree with the way she was raised, but as it is a plot hook, it is delightful!
I do agree that evaluation of potential is important, and that is what I reported for. However, where I saw a character with problems for staying power, you made a character that didn't need staying power.
With that in mind, it performs admirably for its goal.
As you said, that she is more a medium than a character, it becomes apparent the reasons for the back story. If she remained afterward for larger parts of the time, her personality could become a bit wearing, but that wouldn't be the case. Since you clarified that she was to be utilized more than used, it makes much more sense why her personality is so two dimensional.
As for the explanation of the reactions, I did that as a knee-jerk reaction, and I apologize. Generally, if a character has a back story similar to this, it is used as a validation of the characters action, and not a plot device in and of itself. I am sorry about that, it was to cover potential problems. And, yes. I do not agree with the way she was raised, but as it is a plot hook, it is delightful!
I do agree that evaluation of potential is important, and that is what I reported for. However, where I saw a character with problems for staying power, you made a character that didn't need staying power.
With that in mind, it performs admirably for its goal.
127
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 17:19:30
((Well! Look at that, they let me off work early! How should I spend this time? Ponies is the obvious answer!))
Sveta, shlumped over as he was, fell over, rising him out of his stupor. He had fallen, sad and disappointed, hearing of terrible things. He shuddered at the thought of it. With a claw, he traced a small path of dampness that came from his eyes. It seemed he still cried in his loss.
With a hung head, and weary heart, he moved to raise himself.
Sveta, shlumped over as he was, fell over, rising him out of his stupor. He had fallen, sad and disappointed, hearing of terrible things. He shuddered at the thought of it. With a claw, he traced a small path of dampness that came from his eyes. It seemed he still cried in his loss.
With a hung head, and weary heart, he moved to raise himself.
128
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:40:04
LIES! He wanted to scream. LIES! He will DESTROY you and blame it on the CHILD! FOIL is the victim here! Not you two and your wanton Self Destruction! He wanted to scream to the mountain tops, he wanted to chase them, teach them a thing or two.
But he couldn't. He was frozen in fear. They knew each other. They were going to perish, at each other's hooves no less. Who was he in that struggle? He was no one. He would just be another distraction that needed to be... put down.
He struggled within himself, but he couldn't go after them. It was too late for them. Too late for Foil. HE was too late. HE was too slow to catch on. HE couldn't help. He couldn't help...
After a few moments, Sveta broke down crying for another one lost...
((And with that heart throb, I'm going to bed. Night!))
But he couldn't. He was frozen in fear. They knew each other. They were going to perish, at each other's hooves no less. Who was he in that struggle? He was no one. He would just be another distraction that needed to be... put down.
He struggled within himself, but he couldn't go after them. It was too late for them. Too late for Foil. HE was too late. HE was too slow to catch on. HE couldn't help. He couldn't help...
After a few moments, Sveta broke down crying for another one lost...
((And with that heart throb, I'm going to bed. Night!))
129
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:22:41
His face contorted in a series of uncofortable motions. Here is the mother of a child, that poor, poor child, at the hoof of her... and she is worried about her things? How far... how could they... how... He just felt broken
((Also, good luck ever trying to talk to Sveta Ever Again. Ever))
((Also, good luck ever trying to talk to Sveta Ever Again. Ever))
130
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:18:16
He heard a ragged gasp, followed by more normal breathing. Oh my GOSH! He must be helping her! Why? Why oh why would... no. She didn't say... oh my ... Sveta cringed on the inside. He must have conditioned her to be so thankeful! How long until,... and how many times did he... It sounds so dull and sad! And He is her.... oh my.. He could hardly stand being there, but he couldn't flee even if he wanted to.
131
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:10:47
Sveta was simply frozen in mute horror. He couldn't think, he couldn't move, and he didn't even want to think about the poor child. The woman was the mother, but was the man the father? Then why would he just... he couldn't bear to think of it.
And He was just standing there. Watching her. Watching her...
((This is just too fun to write.))
And He was just standing there. Watching her. Watching her...
((This is just too fun to write.))
132
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:05:02
((Family Dynamics of Sadness Go!))
133
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 04:02:14
He listend on in horror. He just ... I mean ... she... For PUSHING HIM?! He couldn't go out now, not with what he had heard. He wouldn't be heard from again... He couldn't...
((Oh this is just too rich!
))
((Oh this is just too rich!
))
134
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:55:10
Mother of the Year? Pah, depends upon the criteria... Wait, why did she scream? His blood ran cold. With monsters like these, what could possibly make them fear?
((Beautiful, beautiful Misunderstandings.))
((Beautiful, beautiful Misunderstandings.))
135
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:51:29
Makes sense? Nothing makes sence about this! They are trying to END the poor child and yet they are having him/her learn Fortune Telling? And what was this about speeding things up? his mind grumbled about the situation. He needed to see this child. Help it, take it, run away with it, ANYTHING but these... these ponies! With determination, he turned towards the tree, and waited, listening so closely...
136
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:44:40
WOODCHIPS?! How in EQUESTRIA could she be cunning? It seems like they would more likely destroy the child than educate him/her! his mind practically screamed. What is wrong with these ponies? he wondered in fear. What ever they are doing, must be stopped. But he needed evidence! Yes, he had to find and see this child that was so mistreated.
137
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:38:07
It?! Kind of like a filly? What to Feed it!? Pudding?! Sveta was shocked at these statements. Was the mother just inept, or delusional? Why were they worried about paint, when a child was lost, in danger of losing his/her voice and eyes! Not to mention the mother was delusional! What is going on here? he thougth.
He had to know more, but feared the answers.
He had to know more, but feared the answers.
138
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:29:08
((Oh, yes indeed he is! )
Sveta was mortified. How could somepony lose their eyes and mouth?! And her Child!? his mind wondered.
Wait, paint? he began to wonder. What in the name of Celestia's Eyebrows were they talking about? He had to find out more. He strained his ears to listen.
Sveta was mortified. How could somepony lose their eyes and mouth?! And her Child!? his mind wondered.
Wait, paint? he began to wonder. What in the name of Celestia's Eyebrows were they talking about? He had to find out more. He strained his ears to listen.
139
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:18:55
Sveta tryed to think of how to approach the mystery stallion, to say hello and what not, but he couldn't seem to find a way that worked. The stallion was simply not... normal feeling.
So, naturally, he did what anyone would do if they were following a stallion that didn't feel normal. He pretended to be sunbathing, or digging something, or just leaning against a tree, all the while trying to get closer to him and see what he was saying...
Suddenly! Upon the scene another entered the picture! She looked unfamilar, but also looked unhappy, so he scuttled over and hid behind a tree, straining his ears to hear them.
You know, spying on someone isn't the best way to introduce yourself, he thought quietly.
Shhh! the rest of his brain grumbled, I'm trying to listen!
So, naturally, he did what anyone would do if they were following a stallion that didn't feel normal. He pretended to be sunbathing, or digging something, or just leaning against a tree, all the while trying to get closer to him and see what he was saying...
Suddenly! Upon the scene another entered the picture! She looked unfamilar, but also looked unhappy, so he scuttled over and hid behind a tree, straining his ears to hear them.
You know, spying on someone isn't the best way to introduce yourself, he thought quietly.
Shhh! the rest of his brain grumbled, I'm trying to listen!
140
Canterlot Archives / Re: Pascalo Beach [SIGN-UP]
2014 Jul 30, 03:07:49
Sveta had suffeciently ruffled his floor to the point of delightful fluffyness, and decided it was well fluffed. Regretfully, he left his fluffy layer of fluff and sighed. With a *womphf* sound, he opened his wings and took to the sky. After a moment or two, he noticed he was lagging behind his usual status. Flying down to his cart, he checked himself.
"Wings? Good. Fur? Not waterlogged. Tail? Still with the plates. Head? St- wait." Turning around, he found, and subsequently removed, the tailpiece still attached. Calmly, he removed it and placed it within his cart.
"... I totally meant to do that." he murmured.
Looking about, he saw the one Nurse who had been very nice to him a while ago, and a pony who was walking away from her. Interested, and with nothing better to do, he waved at the nurse, and began to head over to the mystery pony. He seemed to be distracted by something...
"Wings? Good. Fur? Not waterlogged. Tail? Still with the plates. Head? St- wait." Turning around, he found, and subsequently removed, the tailpiece still attached. Calmly, he removed it and placed it within his cart.
"... I totally meant to do that." he murmured.
Looking about, he saw the one Nurse who had been very nice to him a while ago, and a pony who was walking away from her. Interested, and with nothing better to do, he waved at the nurse, and began to head over to the mystery pony. He seemed to be distracted by something...