Character Critique Thread

Started by Gracie Sky, 2012 Sep 02, 01:43:33

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Ramisha

Uuuuummmmmmm...This might not be nice of me,as you've already helped me with my pony Whispers, but could you evaluate my other ponies? http://forum.legendsofequestria.com/index.php?topic=8753.msg670843#msg670843 And maybe suggeest a name for the first pony....I was thinking Hamerhead,or Aegis,or something with dragons or earth or Tomb Raider(as I was named after Lara Croft)...I'm not good with names that represent myself,but I'm good with naming others.  <3

Gracie Sky

@Bane Emural
Most of the things you explain would be acceptable in context that the world you speak of isn't the Equestria that is featured on the show. Of course, that pretty much falls into the category of "fanfiction".

@Ramisha
There is nothing to evaluate. You only have pictures of your OCs... and only one of them works for me. I really don't want to attempt to give my opinion with such limited knowledge.
Character Critique Thread

Have your OC fairly and honestly evaluated!

Ramisha

sorry then :( for me the pictures have text and they both work,I'll try to fix them but I don't know why aren't they working.Or even better,I should leave the photo and just copy the text.Anyways,thanks for taking your time and telling me that they don't work  ^-^

Bane Emural

Thanks, and it does sound like it is of fanfiction now that I look at it. The world is of an era before the time of Equestria. Thanks for the review.  ^-^
As Time passes by, so does the winds of the Storms, the water of the Seas, and the rock of the Earth. As all things go, from Life to Death, the sands of Time passes by. ~ Bane Emural

Ramisha

Uh, umm, sorry to bother you, but what do you think-which name is better for a pony:
Raidwood - I like this one because it's a pun on redwood which references my pony's colors and also contains raid- a reference to Tomb Raider as I was named after Lara Croft. Oops I've told you my name now  :P
or
Dusty Claw - I also like this one because it's more pony-like and it references my pony's dusty colors, and archaeology-I always wanted to become one (or a secret agent/spy...but seriously this one is more... normal) and Lara Croft is one too.....
Please help,I love both of these names!  :I

Tiger

Quote from: Ramisha on 2013 Sep 13, 04:46:46
Uh, umm, sorry to bother you, but what do you think-which name is better for a pony:
Raidwood - I like this one because it's a pun on redwood which references my pony's colors and also contains raid- a reference to Tomb Raider as I was named after Lara Croft. Oops I've told you my name now  :P
or
Dusty Claw - I also like this one because it's more pony-like and it references my pony's dusty colors, and archaeology-I always wanted to become one (or a secret agent/spy...but seriously this one is more... normal) and Lara Croft is one too.....
Please help,I love both of these names!  :I

Talking in pony sense, a half of these two names are fine as they're purely based off appearance. But we're not sure if there's really a "Lara Croft" in the world of Equestria.

A link to my tumblr above!
Tiger's OC page. Should re-do it...

Ramisha

True but still...I wanted something to resemble Lara Croft.
Maybe Daring Do is the Tomb Raider?

Gracie Sky

I would avoid using the word "raid" in a pony's name, due to the... more violent implications. I would also avoid using the word "claw", unless this pony has claws... which would be odd for a pony, to say the least.

I might push more for "Runewood" or "Dusty Diamonds". If you need more suggestions, let me know.

Character Critique Thread

Have your OC fairly and honestly evaluated!

Ramisha

Wow thanks,Runewood sounds really cool  :o I'm not good with names... but I also think that raid can be used in different ways, e.g. I raided my fridge today. But you are right,it's mostly used in violent ways....

pkgod101

Can you Critique my OC please. http://forum.legendsofequestria.com/index.php?topic=9009.0
I just finished its BIO and would definitely appreciate some feedback.

GoldenTerrabyte

My OCs have changed much since their last critique. Please critique them! Link in sig.
I'm back

SuperNovaNightmare

Hello! I was wondering if you would please critique my two characters, Super Nova, and Froth Spiral. Thanks, and don't hold back. :D

Link: http://forum.legendsofequestria.com/index.php?topic=9022.0

Thanks for reading, Bubai :3

Ramisha

2013 Sep 14, 04:16:49 #212 Last Edit: 2013 Sep 14, 04:18:54 by Ramisha
Ok, I thought about my pony's name before I fell asleep.
I wanted something with "dusty" in it because my pony's colors aren't really bright as you can see from my avatar.
So I was thinking: Dusty Aegis-too long, Dusty Rune-rune is a bit overused...
Dustyshield! That is pretty cool.
My name also means "protection" in latin,I've been researching a bit.
But I also like Dusty Claw or Dusty Talon because...umm,uh they sound cool but as you said it's not really fitting for a pony.
Or maybe Dusty Hills? Dustytail? Dusty Wind!
Ugh I'm not good with names.

ps: so much dust

Chitin

Hello, I was wonder if you could possibly critique my character(s), Chitin, and his alternate form, Weaver. I'll accept any criticism you have about them, so feel free to tell me everything you come up with.

Gracie Sky

@Yellowpikmin476
Most all your characters have a habitual shortness about them. It really makes it difficult for me to find something to comment on that would be meaningful, since I'm rarely one for small talk. I could comment on them as a group or on purely a conceptual level, but such evaluations would be brief. If you need help figuring out how to expound on your descriptions, imagine I'm asking any particular OC's friends or family members to tell me about them and imagine what those friends or family members would tell me about them and summarize all that. Even if some ponies aren't fond of the OC in question, that would definitely add a dimension of complexity to the OC if we piece together exactly why the OC is not on good standing with the interviewee. Cutie mark stories are also a plus.

@Ramisha
If you're having trouble finding a suitable second name for a first name you believe to be perfect, try looking somewhere else for your answer. It's clear you want him to be into artifacts and adventuring, but try going back to his roots (his parents). Were they also adventurers or archaeologists? Maybe their role can play a part in what they named their child. Also, perhaps a second word might not be required if you can enhance the first name to the point where it can stand alone. Give it some more thought. If you need suggestions from me, don't hesitate to ask (although it would be fantastic if you could claim you were the inventor of your OC's name).
Character Critique Thread

Have your OC fairly and honestly evaluated!

Ramisha

Thanks,I was thinking about the pony's parents and I couldn't find anything,but then I found the perfect name: Mountain Dust.
Well,you see,this pony is based on me, and when I was born I was dead for about 5 minutes but then I (obviously) came back to life. I know it sounds silly but it's true-my heart stopped for those 5 minutes.
Then I found the name Mountain Dust and thought about how would if fit me and this came to my mind:
Everything goes on-mountains rise,mountains crumble. Only dust remains. Just like I crumbled from life and rose back,and now I'm only the dust with the spirit of the mountain.............
oh my gosh that sounds so cheesy. And a bit dark.
Oh well.

GoldenTerrabyte

Quote from: Gracie Sky on 2013 Sep 15, 00:52:31
@Yellowpikmin476
Most all your characters have a habitual shortness about them. It really makes it difficult for me to find something to comment on that would be meaningful, since I'm rarely one for small talk. I could comment on them as a group or on purely a conceptual level, but such evaluations would be brief. If you need help figuring out how to expound on your descriptions, imagine I'm asking any particular OC's friends or family members to tell me about them and imagine what those friends or family members would tell me about them and summarize all that. Even if some ponies aren't fond of the OC in question, that would definitely add a dimension of complexity to the OC if we piece together exactly why the OC is not on good standing with the interviewee. Cutie mark stories are also a plus.

@Ramisha
If you're having trouble finding a suitable second name for a first name you believe to be perfect, try looking somewhere else for your answer. It's clear you want him to be into artifacts and adventuring, but try going back to his roots (his parents). Were they also adventurers or archaeologists? Maybe their role can play a part in what they named their child. Also, perhaps a second word might not be required if you can enhance the first name to the point where it can stand alone. Give it some more thought. If you need suggestions from me, don't hesitate to ask (although it would be fantastic if you could claim you were the inventor of your OC's name).
That piece of advise I'm definitely taking. Cutie mark stories. I don't know exactly how I'd solve the other problems, but I can definitely think about cutie mark stories. Also, my main question is this: How have thay been improved/made worse since your last look at them?
I'm back

HaponyHanzo


Gracie Sky

Quote from: Yellowpikmin476 on 2013 Sep 15, 19:40:26That piece of advise I'm definitely taking. Cutie mark stories. I don't know exactly how I'd solve the other problems, but I can definitely think about cutie mark stories. Also, my main question is this: How have thay been improved/made worse since your last look at them?


X3
Forgive my very forgetful memory, but I do review a decent number of OCs. I honestly have no recollection of what the previous incarnations of your characters looked like, so I cannot compare them with the way they currently are. However, I have it on good faith that characters get better with time and practice!
Character Critique Thread

Have your OC fairly and honestly evaluated!

byndbored

Since I'm still having trouble with working with my character I think I should at least tell you about how I want his back story to work. I'm trying to make a character who seen so many scary things that it doesn't effect him that much anymore, who may never know where he came from but doesn't care anymore, and who has problems trusting anyone including himself but is able to stay calm for the most part. (keep in mind I came up with him by using ideas from dreams I had when I was a kid.)
Said no to being given a Lucario Pokemon X.
My oc board is in my Signature
http://forum.legendsofequestria.com/index.php?topic=2268.0

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