Escape to the Future OOC

[Gracie Sky]

I'm a little worried myself. I've noticed in the last few pages that it has just been 4 of us, which is like half the original cast.

Of course, I generally anticipate that participants in the average RP will leave without notice. It's still a bit demoralizing when it does occur, though.

However, if given the go, I can continue, but I still feel hesitant about it.

[Nocturna]

I want to continue it, trust me, we're too far in to not finish it off. Hopefully, after we conclude it, we can start a new, private RP of some variety, with the more active members. If you guys want, we can fast-forward into heading to the castle after escaping from an attack by some villagers. We could also do it to where we lost track of the others, which would lead to them having their own ability to catch up, if they choose to.

[Peace Keeper]

Then not sure how the others will feel. I will notify them to see if they wish to make it brief or if they wish they can drop out. Ima try doing that and hope to get some answeres soon.

[Nocturna]

Honestly, it's really a manner of that it was going to be pretty brief from here on anyway. The skip is due to their inactivity, and the fact that it didn't contribute much to the story, other than restoring trust.

[Peace Keeper]

Alrighties. So whenever you are ready to continue so I can get the support characters to roll the ball for us.

[Nocturna]

Feel free to do so whenever you please

[Gracie Sky]

As the game master, you should be moving the plot along and causing events a little bit faster than you are.

I can only react to things that happen and words that are spoken that are related to my character, but I can only react so much before I must recieve a new prompt. The same can be said of the others as well, which is why I try to create "something to react to" in my posts. However, since I'm not the GM, such creation must only involve Gracie Sky herself, whereas you control the world, the plot, and everypony who is not controlled by a specific RPer here (NPCs).

I'm guessing you are simply waiting until the majority of the users signed up for this RP respond to your latest prompt, which is fine, of course. However, also be aware of what we just previously discussed: the activeness of the cast. So far, I have noted 4 of us (including you) can post at a moment's notice. The rest seem to be come and go, but in the end, it is their responsibility to participate. The rest of the cast should not be held back because somepony else isn't participating.

I'm also considering the pace of the RP as well, since obviously we can't all post at the same rate. In fact, Gracie was left out of the grocery shopping routine because I was away for that day and the entire event was resolved within that day, which is bad pacing imo. I did have a few shenanegians I wanted Gracie to perform there, and she was asked to come along, but I decided to just let it pass. I'd like to say a healthy pace is 1-2 posts a day, but you are allowed to be inactive for approximately 1 day without getting completely left in the dark. However, it's been several days, if not a whole week, that a few of cast have been away. They can easily play catch up or ask for a summary of the events. A good RPer can reinsert themselves at almost any point and it's equally as easy for the rest of us to accept their reentry and continue as if they were there all along.

I apologize if this sounds like I'm complaining or preaching. I am simply trying to offer advice, explaining at length the reasons for my logic. I do believe the pace of the RP is a bit slower than I'd like. That's all I'm really saying. If you can't make it faster or feel it would do more harm than good, I completely understand. I just feel bad when I go entire days without contributing to the storyline because we are waiting for the less active people to react.

[Nocturna]

I assume you're referring to Peace there, as he's the game master, and you are correct. The pace is relative to the activity, apart from recently with the others being MIA. We do need to start doing more with it, but it's really up to Peace for the decision on fast forwarding or not with it.

[Peace Keeper]

Alrighties, From the others, they will ride it put until they feel the need to jump in. Meaning we can continue on, and the rest will follow behind.

Let us finally continue.
Post Merge
I got some news.

Next week are my finals week, so somewhere this weekend or right after this weekend, I am gonna have to go off of LoE for a bit to study for exams. Ima let ya guys know when I will be getting off. If ya like, you can continue on for me. If any of you would like to powerplay my OCs Peacekeeper and Peacemaker for me, feel free to take them till I come back. I hope you take good care of them.
If not, they can watch from behind while all of you continue the story.

Ima try to return very soon on Friday. Good luck in the RP.

[Nocturna]

Not a problem my man, thank you for informing us.

[Peace Keeper]

This is my final day here on LoE. I will be off to concentrate for finals this week. Hopefully you all can communicate on the story or events you guys do.

I was hoping to get my support OC Combo out before I leave, but unfortunately I didn't quite make it. So hope if ya guys would want to use him, go ahead. Here is some info about him.
OC: Combo
Race: Earth
Color: Teal

Combo is a guard for the earth pony village. He keeps guard over the town from any danger from other pony race tribes and creatures. He has grown from hearing of beliefs that all ponies own each other something and won't stop until they get what they want and are deemed superior. The philosophy from the town suggest that they spy on each other in attempts to either raid or gain the resources to help their race. However, Combo has the other half of his belief that all of this can be preventable, and all the hostility is just all mistrust and lack of respect. What he now wants is change, a change to hope that ponies can trust each other, and he believes it can start with the fillies. Though not all ponies will agree to his goal and because of mistrust of other ponies, he will try to defend at all costs to prevent being either captured or slain. He tends to try to not fight much unless his opponent fights first, but also tries to know who his opponent is, their intention, and if they agree to is idea of unity. Also if there are any foals around, no matter the race, he will do his best to defend them as he hopes to gain their trust. But he will tend to avoid any conflict in front of foals.

The other OC Double Edge probably woulnd't be needed much now that he is trapped. Not sure how long the story will last, but in case it is necessary, here is his info
Name: Double Edge
Race: Earth
Color: Black

Double Edge is a good friend of Teal, and both have been training together to help protect their village. Double Edge has been grown strongly to believe that ponies of other races cannot be trusted for similar reasons. Though he kinda has a belief of having to have unity, it is hard for him to be convinced if he feels threatened first. He will insist to help other races only if he feels they can be trusted, but it is quite difficult to convince him. His hardest to convince is the vampony he hears from the village. Perhaps the only one that can convince him is his friend Combo.

As of now Double Edge is in a cave sealed and petrified and stuck. Combo doesn't know that yet, so try not to make it too obvious on Combo's sense of his friend disappeared.

Hope the info helps out. Also, If you want, I can leave my OCs Peacekeeper and Peacemaker to you guys. Their OC info are in the OC thread (should be in page 1). Please take good care of them. I really want them to be around when I come back.
If no one wants to use them, I am totally okay with it. I don't mind at all. They can be just in the back observing and watching and following around.

Well guys, lets hope to have a great RP here. So that way we get to do something while I am gone, the objective is to go to the castle of the sisters (present day ruins) and attempt to help the ponies return to the future. You can make it quick, or a kinda long journey. The rest of the sub events I leave you all to plan.

That is it for me. Thank you for signing up for the RP, and thank you for being here. Enjoy your week, obey the rules, communicate well, and I see you all hopefully on Friday. Byes everyone.

[Gracie Sky]

I just wanted to point out that two different names were given as the name of Nocturna's foal: Strabright on page 21 and Sunset on page 35. Yes, I did recent skim over the whole RP, making sure I don't create any contradictions in my most recent posts. However, I'm wondering if these different names were deliberate or simply an error.

Oh, and Peace Keeper, when I saw the name of your first OC being Combo... I really thought the name of the second one would be "Breaker"
But we already have a Breaker, right?

[Nocturna]

Oh, haha. Sorry about that inconsistency, we could pass it off as her memories fighting eachother(the haze, that's from what I explain in my character's OC thread)

[Peace Keeper]

... when I saw the name of your first OC being Combo... I really thought the name of the second one would be "Breaker"

Just realized that. Honestly, the name Combo was actually brought up from a similar source.

[Gracie Sky]

Since it seems the RP is ending "soon", I would like to offer critiques on RPing performance to those interested. I've never actually critiqued something like this, but I'm sure it can't be any different from the normal OC critiques I do. The idea is to offer feedback and my opinion on key aspects of RPing performed by the individual, as well as acknowledging areas of strength and weakness in terms of general literacy. This feedback is solely for helping develop your RPing skills further, so you have something to reflect upon.

And, of course, if you want me to evaluate your OC specifically, without addressing your RPing abilities, I can do that as well. In fact, I can address both, if you really want to! Don't be afraid to get specific about what exactly you want me to evaluate. I'm fairly flexible.

[Peace Keeper]

I like that idea. Thanks for the offer.
I think a critique would help us understand how we did and how the scenarios played out. Hope to learn from it. I think I played it out well, but could be wrong . I'd appreciate if you would like to do the honors of critiquing. It has been a great RP. Ima see how well everyone enjoyed once we are done, and maybe plan on something after.

[Nocturna]

I would appreciate some critique, however I already know my poor performance throughout this roleplay, so I'm not expecting much.

I would ask for a critique of my OC, but it fares no better.

[Gracie Sky]

Peacekeeper
--------------

For you, your strongest attribute is your dedication and effort. Even in the face of many technical mistakes, I always respect ponies who try their hardest to make something work out. So even if I point out a lot more negative traits in your writing, somepony of your tenacity should be able to overcome these shortfalls with time and practice.

That said, there are a number of things that bother me about the way you write which I'd like to bring up, constructively of course. The first is your fluency. A lot of the sentences you write don't seem to be proper sentences or are just worded confusingly. I really don't know the right way to bring this up, but I get the feeling that English may not be your native language. Your word structures are stiff and... uh... hmm... lack the nuances of a proficient writer. Of course, perhaps you just need more experience as a writer, but that's my take on it.

A few other notes include your ratio of dialouge vs narration. You sometimes have far too much dialouge and no narration whatsoever, and that does bother me to some degree. Characters who only talk are static, which is not generally a good thing. It doesn't help with the fact that when your characters talk, it seems to go on for longer than is needed. Narration gives you a lot of freedom to express important things that wouldn't fit being expressed by speaking, such as the character's thought process, feelings, intentions, and even more general things, like body language and routine. Try to strike that right balance between dialouge and narration.

Pacing is probably my biggest concern, since it affects all the other RPers. As you could see, nopony was fond of the way you skipped over the farewell scene, although I'm sure you didn't mean it like that. You simply weren't aware of the intentions of the others. This is a critical skill to have, "thinking ahead". I believe this may be why your pacing could use improvement. You need to know when the others are ready to move on, and only move on when everypony involved has done the crucial things they wanted to do. I would definately recommend learning to understand what your fellow RPers could be thinking and adapt accordingly.

[Peace Keeper]

Wow. Never seen myself that horrible.

-Honestly, I am a first gen Latin American, and my first language is Spanish. The way how I speak in the RP is the way how I talk at home, and since it is my ponysona, it reflects the same language. I didn't know it would be that difficult to follow for everyone else. Guess I should leave behind my lingo and talk more properly for the RPs. I'll go ahead and make proper English for the future.

-I actually do tend to lack narration. I really like taking the 1st person point-of-view most of the time. Perhaps I should have used it to good ways like expressions of characters and other stuff.

-I know how people were upset, and I even facepalmed myself when I didn't realized it wasn't suppose to end like that. Didn't know that wasn't the signal, but guess I was going a bit too fast myself. Sowies I got a bit impatient and moved on. Had a very slow RP that I accidentally carried on my impatience here. I really like to be involved in the RP a lot. Kinda broke my own rule there.


I am gonna take good mental notes on them so that I don't come out horrible again. Thanks for the critiques, and terribly sorry for a hasty ending. Ima try my best in the future so that the story would come out better for everyone.

[Nocturna]

Yet you're still better than I, Sir Peace of this pie. Even with your mistakes, you fared better within this RP of stakes. I await report of my already well-known downfalls, to attempt improvement, instead of further crumbling of walls.